Biddy Conquers 4 Kingdoms

A fine spring day beckoned and the husband and I decided to take our grandson (DD) to conquer 4 Kingdoms.

If you’ve conjured up visions of suits of armour, dashing chargers, fire-breathing dragons and pointed lances, do not fear: 4 Kingdoms is tamer than that – though very exciting for anyone up to age of 12.

4 Kingdoms Farm and Adventure Park, to give it its full title, is just on the outskirts of Newbury, at Headley. (It is very easy to find but see www.4-kingdoms.co.uk for directions and details of opening times etc). We arrived on a bright May morning, but my goodness the wind was chilly. There are wide open spaces here and I suspect the wind whips up pretty regularly, so my advice is to take plenty of layers.

After parking up in the spacious car park, a warm welcome awaited us. Once you’ve paid your entrance fee, everything (except food and drink, obviously) is free, even the ride-on machines which normally cost at least £1 – and when you are only two-and-a-half you can never get enough of a see-saw with Mr Bump on the other end. 

DD barely knew where to start exploring. To an adult eye the sight looked fairly modest to begin with, but once you are properly ensconced you begin to realise that it stretches on… and on… and on. In fact there are 40 acres of Kingdom and, despite its proximity to the A339, you are surrounded by trees and countryside so well protected from road noise. And within those 40 acres there is lots to keep youngsters occupied for, quite literally, hours on end.

Clearly during school holidays and weekends it gets much busier, but we are making the most of DD being a pre-schooler and, mid-week, were able to enjoy everything at 4 Kingdoms with other families in the same position, and no need to queue.

While many of the facilities have certainly been well-used and could do with a lick of paint, it was early in the season when we visited and the staff were busy making improvements and carrying out general maintenance – and all cheerfully and discreetly. Maintenance is, of course, essential, so visitors are warned that not every ride or facility is necessarily available every day.

So, what is there at 4 Kingdoms? Sandpits, bouncy castles, forts to explore and climb, and lots of slides of varying heights and lengths, so plenty of choice depending on the size of your child. DD is very keen on small buildings which he can run in and out of, and there are many of these in the play village – a police station (plus prison), fire station, post office – even a bank with an ATM machine (non-functioning, I should add). Here too are lots of stationery vehicles, including a speedboat, for those who like to ‘drive’, and DD ran from one to the other with the greatest of glee. (I especially liked the London taxi – you could twist the driver’s head round so he could ask the backseat passenger, ‘Where to, Guv?’)

There are go-carts a-plenty, and what fun we had on those. There are two outside tracks, with go-carts that involve pedal power – great exercise for us – plus an indoor track with electric-powered ones. Woo-hoo!

Then on to the crazy golf (sadly no holes in one for me), and I managed to persuade the husband that perhaps the zip-wire and assault course were not for him.

The site is bordered by the River Enborne and there are three lakes. Go through a gate to follow a nature walk or picnic beside the water while watching ducks and other waterfowl. Beside the Magic Lake is what I would love most of all if I were still five-years-old: the Fairy Wood. There are little fairy houses in the trees too…

Although the Tractor Train was not running on the day of our visit, the fun had not stopped yet. There are animals to be admired in the great outdoors – pygmy goats, llamas and ponies – and in the animal petting area you can meet smaller creatures: rabbits, guinea pigs, chickens and, one of the highlights of our day, baby lambs, which you get a chance to feed at certain times of day in the spring. 

If you don’t bring you own picnic there is an indoor café where you can buy drinks, snacks and lunches – sandwiches, jacket potatoes, or such things as burgers or fish fingers and chips cooked to order. As well as two indoor seating areas, there is a soft play area for little ones if you want some time indoors.

We were there for hours so thought it well worth the entrance fee. Wind-blown, full of fresh air and well exercised, an exhausted DD was asleep in the car before we’d even left the car park!

Biddy x